🕳️🚗🇬🇧Forget economic growth, global diplomacy, or AI regulation — how about just one victory that doesn’t require a think tank or three years of “consultation”? Fill. The. Damn. Potholes. That’s it. That’s the manifesto. The only infrastructure project that could unite the nation faster than free Greggs for all.
🛞 The Road to Nowhere (Literally)
Every drive now feels like a budget version of Mad Max: Brexit Road. You weave, you dodge, you pray your suspension doesn’t give up before you do. Entire neighbourhoods look like they’ve been shelled by budget cuts. Yet somehow, our leaders keep finding time to argue about Lords reform, immigration targets, and whether an MP’s second home qualifies for taxpayer-funded wallpaper.
Imagine — just for a second — if the government put as much energy into asphalt as it does into ass-covering. If the Commons and Lords spent one joint session actually discussing holes in the road instead of holes in accountability. We’d have smoother rides, happier voters, and maybe even an election where people clapped out of gratitude instead of disbelief.
Let’s face it: filling potholes would be the first measurable act of competence in over a decade. A legacy project we could literally drive over. But instead, our roads remain a metaphor — a bumpy, uneven, endlessly patched-up mess.
And the irony? They could fill every single pothole with the nonsense that pours out of Westminster. They wouldn’t even need tarmac — just pure, unfiltered debate transcripts. Stronger than cement.
🔥 Challenges 🔥
If politicians can’t fix a hole in the ground, how can they fix a country? 💭
Tell us your worst pothole horror story, or your most ridiculous government “priority.” Comment below — vent your rage before your tyres do. 💬🔥
👇 Like, comment, share — and let’s start the campaign that actually matters: #FillTheHoles
The sharpest takes will feature in the next issue of the magazine. 🛞💥
Chameleon Magazine 
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