Chameleon Magazine

 🌲🚧Pack your waterproofs and prepare your wallet: Centre Parcs is finally coming to Scotland — specifically to the wild and not-so-willing doorstep of Hawick in the Scottish Borders. The resort will include 700 lodges, a splash of artificially forested woodland, and just enough controversy to keep the local pub chat spicy for the next decade. 🍺🌳

Despite 40 local objections (and let’s be honest, that’s every second person and their dug), the plans have been approved. Scottish Borders Council says they’re “satisfied” — which is planner-speak for “the cheque cleared.”

🪵 Welcome to Holiday Dystopia (Just 3 Miles from Town)

Let’s be clear: this isn’t just a few cabins and a hot tub. This is Centre Parcs, the Disneyland of mid-range family chaos, known for its eye-watering prices, baffling wristbands, and the magical ability to make you forget what daylight looks like thanks to the indoor dome.

Now it’s setting up camp in Hawick, a place previously known for textiles, rugby, and not being Nottingham. Cue the concerns:

🚜 Farmland? Gone.

🚗 Traffic? Gridlocked.

🌾 Tranquillity? Replaced with aqua aerobics and screaming children.

🎯 Access? Sorry, locals — that’s for paying customers now.

But hey, if you’ve always wanted to hear the sound of quad bikes and karaoke echoing through a once-serene landscape, good news: your dreams are about to come true.

As always, it’s the classic story — a few hundred “eco lodges” get planted in a newly invented forest and suddenly it’s all about “economic growth”. Meanwhile, lifelong residents are left asking why they now need to take a detour to reach their own sheep.

Let’s hope Centre Parcs brings jobs, brings tourism, and doesn’t bring their £18 buffet breakfasts with the sad scrambled eggs. 🙃

Should the Scottish Borders become a branded woodland theme park? Or is this just another example of corporate “greenwashing” wrapped in rustic timber? What happens when the holiday ends and the locals are left with the bill? Drop your thoughts in the blog comments — not just the Facebook thread. We want your real reactions, wild or woodsy. 🌲👀

👇 Hit comment, hit like, hit share. Or hit the dome for overpriced paddleboarding and a fake falafel wrap.

The best comments will be featured in the next issue of the magazine. 📝🏞️