Chameleon Magazine

 🎅❄️Father Christmas has officially been dragged before the diversity tribunal, where his beard, his judgement skills, and even his elves have been found… problematic.

According to Brighton and Hove Museums, Santa is not just festive — he’s too white, too Western, and far too comfortable deciding who’s naughty or nice without first submitting to a values review panel and a 12-week decolonisation workshop.

🧑‍🎄 The Naughty List Is Now a Microaggression

In a blog post that reads like satire but tragically isn’t, the museum argues that Santa Claus represents a “Western binary” where the “coloniser has the power to judge all people.” Yes. A mythical man with flying reindeer is apparently running an empire. 🦌🚩

We’re told Santa must be “decolonised,” should stop judging behaviour, must share authority with elves (who are also apparently a little too white), and ideally be joined by a Mother Christmas to smash the patriarchy somewhere between the sherry and the sprouts. Nothing says Christmas magic like an ideological coup in Lapland.

🎄 And Here’s the Bit They Don’t Want to Say Out Loud

What’s really depressing is that we’re being told to change Santa — a figure rooted in tradition, imagination, and childhood joy — because a small group of non-believers don’t want to celebrate him. Santa isn’t being shoved down anyone’s throat. He’s not compulsory. There’s no knock on the door demanding ideological compliance and a mince pie.

If parts of society don’t want to believe in Father Christmas, that’s fine. Truly. They are perfectly free to put their beliefs somewhere else and crack on. What’s not fine is trying to lecture British people that they shouldn’t enjoy, celebrate, or pass on a tradition that has existed for generations — all because a handful of joy-allergic gringes find it inconvenient.

This isn’t inclusion. It’s intrusion. Christmas doesn’t need to justify itself to people who don’t like it. And it certainly doesn’t need permission from museum blog editors to exist. 🎁🇬🇧

Children don’t see Santa as a “white Western moral authority.” They see him as a magical bloke who might bring them presents if they behave and don’t bite their siblings. Adults, meanwhile, see Santa and immediately reach for a sociology essay and a red pen.

🔥 Challenges 🔥

Why must traditions bend to those who don’t even want them? When did opting out turn into demanding everyone else stop? And why are we so desperate to dismantle harmless joy to appease people who wouldn’t be happy either way? Drop your festive fury, sarcasm, or outright disbelief in the blog comments. 💬🔥

👇 Comment. Like. Share. Defend Santa — or roast him (politely).

The best comments will be featured in the next issue of the magazine. 🎯📝