Chameleon Magazine

In what can only be described as Britain’s most hydrated embarrassment, a new campaign titled “Help Kent Get Water” has launched, urging generous souls to donate just £5 — enough to supply two days of emergency water to parched families in Maidstone, Tunbridge Wells, and other parts of the once-proudly-hydrated Garden of England. With taps dry, schools shut, and locals reduced to rinsing spaghetti in Prosecco, this utterly non-satirical (but tragically hilarious) appeal mirrors the kind of charity posters usually reserved for drought-stricken regions half a world away. Volunteers are handing out jerry cans by torchlight, Ofwat has deployed a helicopter for dramatic effect, and private water companies continue their noble work of staying rich and apologising profusely. It’s not just a water crisis — it’s a national facepalm soaked in irony. Donate now, because no one should have to boil a kettle with sparkling mineral water from the garage. 💧🇬🇧