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Apparently, Boris Johnsonβ€”yes, that Borisβ€”is now moonlighting as a guest lecturer at the University of Miami. Students are calling his talks β€œriveting” and β€œhumorous,” which is an inspiring way of saying, β€œWe’re paying $50,000 a year for stand-up comedy with a Brexit hangover.”

πŸŽ“ From Downing Street to Dumbing It Down

Imagine surviving a global pandemic, political implosions, and the slow-burning dumpster fire of a crumbling NHSβ€”only to discover that the very man who helped orchestrate this circus has packed up his crumpled suits and Churchill cosplay, and is now educating the next generation of Americans.

That’s not a satire sketch. That’s the syllabus.

What’s he teaching? Advanced Mismanagement? The Art of the Non-Apology? Hair Care for Chaotic Neutral Characters?

Let’s be honest: Boris’ true credentials lie in how not to lead a country. He treated governing like an improv show with no script and an endless tab at the taxpayer-funded bar. And now he’s flown across the Atlantic to drop pearls of disheveled wisdom on unsuspecting undergrads whose only crime was signing up for a political science elective.

Of course, students are entertained. They think it’s performance art. They don’t realize this man once tried to run a country the way you’d run a brunch group chatβ€”badly, inconsistently, and always with someone quitting.

Is this how empires end? Not with a bang, but with Boris Johnson lecturing in Miami while quoting Homer and forgetting which country he’s in?

🧨 Challenges 🧨

Are we really letting Boris Johnson reinvent himself as a sage of democracy? Where do we sign up to get paid for catastrophic decision-making and a few Latin phrases? Sound off in the blog commentsβ€”should we be horrified, hysterical, or both? πŸ—£οΈπŸ‡¬πŸ‡§πŸ‡ΊπŸ‡Έ

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Ian McEwan

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