Chameleon Magazine

 🔴💥Keir Starmer—Britain’s leading expert in fence-sitting—has once again found his footing firmly planted in… Washington D.C. 🇺🇸💂‍♂️ When asked about potential U.S. strikes on Iran, our man practically handed over the launch codes himself, warning Tehran not to “acquire nuclear weapons” like a stern headmaster scolding a radioactive student. No nuance. No diplomacy. Just full-throttle, missile-rattling theatre from a man who once championed human rights—now cosplaying as NATO’s favourite lapdog.

🐕 The Loyal Pup Who Barks for Bombs

Only last week, Donald Trump (yes, that one) metaphorically stuffed Starmer in a locker with a slap about the UK’s failings—and this week? Keir’s back wagging his tail, asking if Trump needs any help pressing buttons or drafting war slogans. And if that loyalty pays off, perhaps Sir Stammer can dust off his barrister’s robes post-retirement to prosecute the very soldiers he cheered into another desert quagmire.

From legal eagle to warhawk with an amnesia problem—how very centrist. 🕊️➡️🦅

You’d think someone who spent years investigating state wrongdoing might hesitate before greenlighting another foreign conflict. But no, Starmer’s foreign policy seems to be: Whatever the Americans say, I say louder. Next stop: Baghdad 2.0, starring Keir and the Ghosts of WMDs Past.

Because nothing screams “responsible governance” like pledging allegiance to a twice-impeached orange wildcard while paving the road for yet another generation of British troops to return in boxes or with scars no inquiry will fix.

Bravo, Keir. You’ve mastered the art of becoming everything you once opposed. 🏆

💣 Challenges 💣

Are we really doing this again? Let’s play “Spot the Difference” between Starmer and Blair’s Greatest Hits Tour. Why are we so eager to follow Trump into another oil-flavoured disaster? Drop your fury, memes, or rants in the blog comments. We want all the heat. 🔥💬