Chameleon Magazine

When Keir Starmer blames a “botched Brexit” and casts side-eye at Nigel Farage like he’s Voldemort in a pinstripe, he’s not telling you the truth — he’s dodging it. Brexit didn’t sneak in through the back door while Britain slept. It rang the doorbell, walked in with 17.4 million votes, and made itself at home. And the elites have been choking on the tea ever since.

🪞Mirror, Mirror, Who Really Botched Brexit?

The UK didn’t get Brexit done to it — it did Brexit to itself.

And here’s the awkward bit no one in Westminster wants to say aloud over their artisan flat whites: blaming Farage is political deodorant for the stink of their failure. Labour, the Tories, the civil service — they all cheered on the comfy EU cushion that protected them from ever having to take real responsibility. Voters kicked that cushion into the Channel.

But instead of stepping up, politicians play hot potato with Farage’s name like it’s a cursed object. Meanwhile, who signed the deals? Who programmed the customs software? Who stared down the economy with all the intensity of a damp sponge?

Spoiler alert: It wasn’t Nigel.

And let’s talk about “botched Brexit,” that oh-so-convenient phrase that’s basically code for: “It wasn’t the choice that was wrong, it was the commoners who made it.” Dressing up condescension in policy language doesn’t make it any less smug.

Brexit isn’t a bug in the system. It was the system reboot. And if the establishment can’t run the new OS, maybe it’s time to stop blaming the voters and start upgrading the leadership.

Or here’s a wild thought: govern.

🧨 Challenges🧨

Why are we still letting politicians gaslight us into thinking Brexit was some rogue algorithm uploaded by Nigel Farage at 3 a.m.? Why does “botched” always mean “not what we would have done”? And when exactly do leaders stop blaming the referendum and start working with the result?