🚗⚡👴Adam Raphael, aged 87, once grilled politicians on Newsnight. Now he’s grilling Tesla—because apparently, his “intelligent” car wasn’t clever enough to tell him he was speeding. Forget autopilot, forget summoning your car with an app—what Raphael wanted was a polite little beep saying, “Ease up, grandad, you’re going too fast.”
🧠 The Dumb Side of “Smart”
Tesla loves to brag about rockets on wheels, AI brains, and software updates that can practically make your car do the samba. Yet it somehow missed the obvious: a warning alert when you break the speed limit. The result? An 87-year-old caught with a heavy foot and an even heavier excuse.
It’s like buying a smartphone with face recognition, hologram projection, and coffee-making capability—but forgetting it can’t actually make phone calls.
🏎️ The Blame Game
Raphael’s line is clear: he didn’t speed, the car sped. Because if Tesla doesn’t nag you like a backseat driver, how on earth are you supposed to know that 40mph feels suspiciously like 60? He might as well sue Nike for making shoes that “failed” to stop him from running too quickly. Or blame his kettle for not warning him the tea was too hot.
🚦 Road Reality Check
Here’s the uncomfortable truth: whether you’re 27 or 87, the ultimate speed warning is still those big round signs on the side of the road. If Tesla really has to design a car to babysit every driver, then maybe we should rename them from “self-driving vehicles” to “self-nagging vehicles.”
🔥 Challenges 🔥
Is Raphael right—should “smart” cars keep us in line—or is this just another case of tech becoming a scapegoat for human error? 🚦💥
We want your verdict in the blog comments.
👇 Hit comment, hit like, hit share. Roast Tesla, roast the driver, or roast both.
The best burns will be featured in the next issue of the magazine. 📝🔥
Chameleon Magazine 
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